In my previous post, I wrote a love poem to How I Met Your Mother called Enjoy the Ride talking about how much I loved the show and how much I appreciated it and all of the character development and how much it meant to me. I take it all back. There was so much wrong with the finale that I've been yelling and seething since I watched it. I didn't sleep Monday night because all I was thinking about was how Carter Bays and Craig Thomas fucked up so hard. Don't see what went wrong? I'll go through every character and their storyline of the finale in relation with the rest of the show and show you how they messed up the lives of the characters just for a shocking ending. MARSHALL ERIKSEN Okay, so actually Marshall's storyline wasn't too messed up if you look at him by himself: he came back from italy and after a reasonable amount of time working at a crappy corporate law office, he became a judge and then a Supreme Court judge . That's so good and so beautiful and I am so proud of him, I really am. At least Carter Bays and Craig Thomas didn't mess up his life. LILY ALDRIN When the finale first ended I thought, "well, at least they didn't screw up Marshall and Lily's lives"; but with another glance I realize that is just not true. The thing about this finale is that nothing really happened to Lily and Marshall - at least we know where Marshall is heading, but we have no idea what the heck is going in with Lily. The two of them go to Rome and then they come back. They have another baby (boy, girl, who knows). And that's all we know about Lily. What I really want to know is how her art career is going - is she pursuing her own art career or is she still with the Captain? Did she she go back to teaching or is she doing something completely different, like maybe an art curator at a museum? I don't know. No one knows. I don't even thing Bays and Thomas know, or else they would have mentioned something, anything to soothe the Lily-lovers. BARNEY STINSON Oh, Barney. My sweet, wonderful Barney. They killed you, they really did. Or, at least, might as well have. They killed who you had become, they killed the character they spent nine years developing from a self-absorbed sociopathic sex-addict to a loving, devoted fiance who no longer needed to fill the void in his soul with a different girl every night. You had become this amazing thing over the course of the series, making grand gestures to show your feelings to the ones you cared about, and then they just threw that away when things got a little too hard. What makes me really angry is that giving up is not something Barney Stinson does - if a girl rejected him, he would go back and tell her he was his own twin; when Quin would not date him, he convinced her; when Ted got in a car accident, Barney ran to the hospital to see him, even though they were not bros at the time. Barney Stinson is not someone who gives up, and is especially not someone who gives up people he loves. And he loved Robin. He will always love Robin. Also, what the fuck was that perfect month shit? That's disgusting, even for Barney. A Barney who, by the way, had changed into someone who did not find his player life fulfilling and who needed something more than that. But you know, just disregard nine years of character development. That's totally okay. ROBIN SCHERBATSKY From the very beginning up until this last episode, Robin was my favorite character. She was smart, independant, hot, funny, and I like to imagine that, if the show were not on CBS, she would swear like a fucking sailor. But this last episode - she was the villain, she was the bad guy who wrecked everything. She took Barney on the road with her and didn't want to settle down in one place because he job was too important to her - Barney definitely knew that and understood that before they got together. From the very beginning, Robin has been someone who would not give up anything for anybody very easily; and Barney has seen that side of her for nine years. But in addition to this being Barney's fault - not taking into account this intense work ethic his wife has - it's also Robin's. She has changed over the past nine years; she has given up things for people she cared about. Remember Don? She turned down a job to be with him - now, that did not turn out the way she expected, but it showed a lot of growth that the writers just ignored. Her and Barney did not even talk about their situation - Barney wanting to settle down and Robin enjoying her job: they just gave up. That's not how a marriage works. On top of all this, Robin does not love Ted. She did at one point. Twenty-three years before Ted is telling this story to his kids. She has said on several occasions that she does not love Ted, even when he thinks he loves her. First of all, the reason they break up waaayy back in 2007 is because they want different things: Ted wants to get married and have kids, and Robin wants to work and travel. In 2012, Ted tells Robin he loves her, and, when prompted, she says she does not love him. No means no, Ted. I'm surprised Robin was smiling when Ted showed up at her apartment. I would have been pissed. TED MOSBY Jesus Christ, Ted. You know, I never really liked Ted, but this was just horrendous. This love for Robin - this obsession that has lasted 25 years and survived break-ups and rejections and other marriages - completely illegitimizes Ted's love for the mother. He spent all those years married to Tracey, always with Robin in the back of his mind because she's not married anymore so he has a chance with her. Something is seriously wrong with this kid when after everything with him and Robin he still expects it to work out. What??? No, Ted. Wrong. Robin doesn't love you. Ted's entire thing was that he believed in faith and destiny and 'the one'. Well, he found his one in the mother. Robin is not his 'one'. Ted and Robin are toxic together, and I'm surprised the writers even considered this ending. They're basically saying "Hey, guys! If you love a woman, pursue her for eight years and even after both of you get married to other people, you should still go for it 23 years later, and she'll still be so into you! Good luck, dudes!" That's not the message you should be sending, guys. We spent nine years listening to this guy talk about how in-love Lily and Marshall are, how intense Robin is, and how much of a sociopath Barney is. Looking back on the previous seasons with what we know now, I'm not so sure Barney was all that bad. I mean, he totally could have been and I loved his character up until he just gave up on his marriage, but does our narrator not lose all of his credence the moment we find out this whole story was just his way of asking his kids for permission to date Robin? I'm sure, in his mind, they are more likely to tell him to go for it if he makes it sound like the other option is a horrible, disgusting player who doesn't give two shits about the women he dates. He played up to Barney's worst attributes to makes him seem like and angel in comparison. What the fuck, Ted. TRACY McCONNELL You had so much potential. I liked you a whole lot more than I liked Ted - although, that's not really saying much because I usually hate Ted. But you were perfect for him and then you were just killed off right when we found out your name. How fucked up is that? I think Thomas and Bays just get off on emotionally traumatizing their viewers, because killing you off was just one of the many things they have written to make me cry. But here's my real beef with this storyline: you were supposed to be the ending. The show is called How I Met Your Mother, so I mistakenly assumed the show would end with the mother. How foolish of me to think the show's title character would be used as anything but a plot device to help the leading male pop out a couple of kids before he tries yet again to woo his best friend. I really should have seen this coming; I should have known that by How I Met Your Mother, Bays and Thomas really meant How I Pursued Your Aunt Robin and Settled for Your Mother Until She Died and then I Pursued Your Aunt Some More. Really, my disappointment is my own fault. I could probably rant forever on everything that was wrong with this finale (in fact, my friend made a list. I helped), but I think this is a good place to stop. I really can not even comprehend the amount of idiocy went into the writing of this finale. I don't really think Thomas and Bays realize that by planning their ending way back when, they restricted themselves to only being able to write their characters as if they were still in season 1 - as the show goes on, your characters change and evolve, and when you write the ending before your characters evolve, they will revert back to how they were in season one in a matter of minutes.
I've seen a lot of finales, and this is probably the worst finale I have ever seen - and I've seen the Cheers finale.
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O. FedericiI like to like things. Archives
May 2014
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